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Crystal Cave Caper/Transcript

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(opens up on Priscilla)
Priscilla: So, on behalf of the Flower Club Beautification Society, and that's us...
(ladies laugh)
Priscilla: We'd like to dedicate a fancy crystal chandelier to Town Hall.
Callie: Why, that's mighty thoughtful of you, Priscilla.
Toby: Yeah. Uh, where is it?
Priscilla: Where's what?
Peck: The fancy lights with the fancy name.
Priscilla: You mean the chandelier? Oh, well. About that. We don't exactly have one. We were thinking Mr. Dillo could build it for us.
(ladies laugh)
Mr. Dillo: I'd be happy to, ladies. But, I don't have any crystals. Fancy rocks are kinda hard to find.
(ladies sigh)
Callie: I reckon we could ask Dirty Dan and Dusty to dig us up some.
Peck: Good idea, sheriff. Miners are great at findin' rocks.

(cuts outside the door)
The Prairie Dogs: They're great at findin' rocks

(cut to Dirty Dan and Dusty eating slop soup)
Dirty Dan and Dusty: (laughs)
Dirty Dan: You take the last biscuit, Dusty.
Dusty: No, you take it, Dirty Dan.
Dirty Dan: Go on, brother. It's yours.
Dusty: No, brother. It's yours.
(a bird takes the biscuit)
Dirty Dan and Dusty: (laughs) It's his!
(Callie and Peck come by)
Callie: Howdy, partners.
Dirty Dan: Well, howdy, sheriff.
Dusty: Hiya, Peck. Hungry? We got some slop soup!
Callie: No thanks, fellas. We're here to ask a favor.
Peck: You two know where to find some crystals? Mr. Dillo's makin' a fancy chandelier for Town Hall.
Dirty Dan: Sure. We done seen a heap of crystals in that cave over yonder.
Dusty: Be happy to dig some up for you, sheriff. We love diggin'.
Callie: Why, that'd be just dandy.
Dirty Dan: We'll have 'em to you faster than you can say "Dirty Dusty diamonds". (laughs) Come on, brother.
Peck: Thanks!
Callie: See ya soon, fellers.

(cut to the cave)
Dirty Dan: Say, brother. You remember where we seen them crystals?
Dusty: Sure do, brother. They were in the dark part of the cave.
Dirty Dan: (laughs) Dusty, it's dark everywhere in the cave. It's a cave.
Dusty: Oh, yeah. (points at another part of the cave) Hey, there's somethin' shiny down that a-way. Come on.
(they find a part of the cave where there are crystals)
Dusty: Hoo-wee! Just look at them crystals!
Dirty Dan: Sheriff Callie's gonna love these.
(a snoring sound plays)
Dirty Dan: Uh, brother, did you hear that?
Dusty: Hear what?
Dirty Dan: That.
Dusty: What is it?
(the camera zooms to reveal a bat)
Dirty Dan: I don't know, but it sure is big.
Dusty: Yeah. Big and scary.
Dirty Dan: I... think... it's... a...
Dirty Dan and Dusty: Cave monster!
(Dirty Dan and Dusty scream)
(the bat continues snoring)
(Dirty Dan and Dusty run out of the cave, panting)

(cut to the outside of the cave)
Dusty: Phew, that was close, brother.
Dirty Dan: Sure was. But at least we escaped with our bag of crystals!
Dusty: Dagnabbit, Dirty Dan. That's your hat!
Dirty Dan: Shucks. Must've dropped the bag of crystals in the cave.
Dusty: Aw, we promised Sheriff Callie we'd get her them crystals!
(Dirty Dan and Dusty fall from the tree)
Dirty Dan: Then, we gotta go back in there and get 'em.
Dusty: Go back in? Oh... I don't know.
Dirty Dan: Come on, brother. We're big, strong, tough miners, right?
Dusty: Right! We're not a-scared of nothin'!

(Song: I'm Not A-Scared of Nothin')
Dirty Dan: Oh, I'm not a-scared of nothin'
Dusty: And nothin' is scary to me
Dirty Dan and Dusty: We're a couple of brave 'uns
Brave as two fellers could be

Dirty Dan: I'm not afraid of rocks
Not afraid of trees
I'm not afraid of bumble bees

Oh, I'm not a-scared of nothin'
Dusty: And nothin' is scary to me
Dirty Dan and Dusty: We're a couple of brave 'uns
Brave as two fellers could be

Dusty: I'm not afraid of birds that fly or tweet
Not afraid of my brother's stinky feet

Dirty Dan: Hey! Oh, I'm not a-scared of nothin'
Dusty: And nothin' is scary to me
Dirty Dan and Dusty: We're a couple of brave 'uns
Brave as two fellers could be

(in the cave, the bat is still snoring)
Dirty Dan and Dusty: The monster!
Bat: (stutters) A...m-m-m-monster?
(Dirty Dan and Dusty scream)
(bat screams)

The Prairie Dogs: Those brothers are actin'
Like big old scaredy cats
That shadow ain't a monster
It's just a little bat

(cut to Priscilla)
Priscilla: We'll hang the chandelier from this hook. You just need to hammer it in to the ceiling right there.
Mr. Dillo: My, that's high. How about we just put it on the floor instead?
(Peck and Callie come in)
Callie: Don't be scared, Mr. Dillo. You can use this ladder.
Peck: It's nice and safe.
Mr. Dillo: Well, all right.
Toby: Just don't look down!
Mr. Dillo: Huh? What was that? (Mr. Dillo looks down, gasps, falls down the ladder)
All: (screaming)
Priscilla: Are you okay, Mr. Dillo?
Toby: Looks like puttin' up a chandelier is gonna take a while.
Peck: Speakin' of takin' a while, where are Dirty Dan and Dusty? They should be here by now.
Callie: You're right. Maybe, we should go check up on 'em. Come on, Peck.

(cut to Dirty Dan and Dusty)
Dusty: Don't stop, brother!
Dirty Dan: Keep running! I think we lost him.
(bat squeaks)
Dusty: No, we didn't! Ahh... Monster!
Dirty Dan: Hide! (him and Dusty hide behind the crystals) We gotta get outta here brother. Even without them crystals.
Dusty: I'm with you, brother!
Dirty Dan: But, which way's out?
Dusty: I know. It's the way with the rocks. And the darkness.
Dirty Dan: That's every way, Dusty.
Dusty: Oh, dagnabbit.
(the bat, Dirty Dan, and Dusty scream)
Dirty Dan and Dusty: Help! Help! (pauses) Of all the dirty, dusty luck. We lost the monster, but now, we're lost!

(cut to Callie and Peck)
Callie: Dirty Dan? Dusty? Are you in here?
Peck: Look, sheriff! Crystals.
Callie: Huh... that's Dirty Dan and Dusty's bag. They must be around here somewhere!
(a bat flies by)
Peck: Ah! What's that?
Callie: There's nothin' to be scared of in here.
Peck: (sees a bat fly around again) Except that! Was that a m-m-m-m-monster?
Callie: Peck, you know there's no such thing as monsters. It's probably just a cave critter of some sort. Let's follow him and ask if he's seen our friends.
Peck: There it is!
(the bat flies again)
Callie: It went that way! C'mon!

(cut to another part of the cave)
Bat: Please, cave monster!
Callie: Cave monster?
Bat: Don't eat me!
Peck: (chuckles) Whoa. Settle down there, fella. We're not monsters.
Callie: Yeah, we didn't mean to scare ya. We're nice and friendly. See?
Bat: N-N-Nice and friendly? (sighs) That's what I would call a relief. And. by "relief", I mean I'm really happy you're not gonna eat me. I'm Batty Belfry by the way. Nice to meet you.
Callie: Nice to meet you too, Batty. I'm Sheriff Callie. And this here's Deputy Peck.
Peck: We're lookin' for our friends, Dirty Dan and Dusty. Have you seen 'em? They're dirty... and dusty.
Batty: I'm afraid I haven't. But I did see two rather scary blue cave monsters with hats and snouts and...
Peck: Those aren't cave monsters, Batty. Those are our friends.
Batty: Your friends? (chuckles) My mistake.
Callie: Happen to know where they are?
Batty: Sorry, I was too busy flyin' for my life to see which way they went.
Callie: Guess we gotta keep lookin'.
Peck: But this cave's so dark, it'll take forever to find them, sheriff.
Batty: Not if I help ya. My ears hear exceptionally well, and once I hear your friends, I can... (gasps) That's them. This way.
Peck: Wow. He really does hear well.

(cut to Dirty Dan and Dusty)
Dirty Dan and Dusty: (panting)
Dusty: This is the way out, brother. I just know it.
(Dirty Dan and Dusty bump their noses)
Dirty Dan and Dusty: Oh!
Dusty: I'm sorry, brother.
Dirty Dan: I'm super-duper sorry with a dirt clod on top.
Batty: (squeaks)
Dirty Dan: Uh, brother?
(Batty continues squeaking)
Dusty: It's the cave monster! And it's done brought all its cave monster friends!
Dirty Dan: There's nowhere to run!
Dusty: Quick! Pretend you're a rock, so they don't see us!
Callie: I see them! Howdy, Dirty Dan. Howdy, Dusty.
Dirty Dan: Sheriff! Thank goodness you're here!
Dusty: There's a scary cave monster chasin' us, and...
Dirty Dan: Oh! It's right behind you!
Callie: (chuckles) Aw, fellas. That's just a shadow.
Batty: My shadow. See?
Dirty Dan: Huh?
Dirty Dan and Dusty: Oh.
Batty: I can make a bunny too. Look.
(Dirty Dan and Dusty laugh)
Dirty Dan: Well, I'll be.
Dusty: A funny bunny!
Callie: Fellas, meet our new friend, Batty Belfry. He helped us find you.
Peck: Yep. And he's gonna help us get out of this cave too.
Dirty Dan: Much obliged, Batty.
Dusty: Yeah, thanks!
Batty: Please, fellas, the pleasure's all mine. Now follow me.
(Batty flies out of the cave)

(cut to Priscilla's Flower Club)
Batty: Finished! Light it up, Mr. Dillo!
(Mr. Dillo lights up the chandelier)
(townsfolk gasp in awe)
Dirty Dan: We sure were lucky to meet a friend like you, Batty. Not only did you rescue us from that cave...
Priscilla: You helped us hang those crystals on our beautiful chandelier.
(Flower Club members giggle)
Dusty: I can't believe we were scared of such a nice little fella.
Callie: Guess you never know who will turn out to be a friend.
Batty: Speakin' of friends, next time you're in the cave, you, uhh... wanna hang out?
(everyone laughs)
Callie: We'd love to hang out with you.
The Prairie Dogs: They'd like to hang out with him
(episode ends)

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